Cancer Journey
All kinds of people get cancer. Grandparents, uncles, neighbors, teachers and yes, even children. In fact, every year about 15,590 young people from birth to 19 years old will receive a cancer diagnosis in the United States. To put this in perspective, every day 47 families in the U.S. will learn that their child has cancer. And for those of us who receive this gut-wrenching news, life instantly changes as cancer catapults our child into their cancer journey.
Childhood Cancer
Indeed, a childhood cancer diagnosis is frightening and confusing for every family member. And of course, there are a lot of questions that parents, and caregivers have when their child is diagnosed. Certainly, learning about the type of cancer it is, how it is treated and what to expect are important and emotional conversations.
In addition to learning about the specific cancer, it’s also helpful to have some general information about childhood cancer. Here are the basics. Childhood cancer usually means a cancer that is found in children and teenagers. It can, occasionally be found in young adults as well. Cancer is not just one disease but rather a group of related diseases.
Both childhood cancer types and adult cancers are diseases of the cells. Cancer happens when abnormal cells grow too quickly in an uncontrolled way. They get in the way of healthy, normal cells. These cells can sometimes metastasize and spread to other parts of the body through the blood and lymph systems.
But the parts of the body where cancer occurs most often are different for children and adults. According to the National Cancer Institute, “The most common types of cancer diagnosed in children ages 0 to 14 years are leukemias, brain and other central nervous system (CNS) tumors, and lymphomas.” And together these cancers account for more than half of all childhood cancers. But they account for less than 10% of cancers diagnosed in adults.
The Causes of Childhood Cancer
According to the National Cancer Institute, the causes of most childhood cancers are not known. They do know that an inherited mutation (a genetic mutation which passes from parents to their children) causes about 5 percent of all childhood cancers.
“Most cancers in children, like those in adults, are thought to develop as a result of mutations in genes that lead to uncontrolled cell growth and eventually cancer. In adults, these gene mutations reflect the cumulative effects of aging and long-term exposure to cancer-causing substances. However, identifying potential environmental causes of childhood cancer has been difficult, partly because cancer in children is rare and partly because it is difficult to determine what children might have been exposed to early in their development. More information about possible causes of cancer in children is available in the fact sheet, Cancer in Children and Adolescents.”
Getting Through Difficult Times
Mikey Friedman, the founder of Mikey’s Way, was just 15 when he received his cancer diagnosis. He journaled a lot along his cancer journey reflecting his thoughts, feelings, and wisdom.
“The way I look at it is a good attitude will make getting through such difficult times much easier.” he wrote, “The first reaction that most do have when dealt such a hard hand is to question. Why me? What did I say or do to deserve this? Who did I insult? Was it God? Has God willed this? I take back everything I ever did, just tell me why. I think I skipped that phase.”
Mikey went on to explain why he didn’t ask why. “I didn’t ask why for three very good reasons. First, it doesn’t matter why; it has happened and must be solved. Second, if I could answer the question why I got cancer, I wouldn’t be writing, I’d have someone writing for me as I sit on my own tropical island surrounded by gorgeous women. Third, and most sufficient, is the fact that it is a stupid question. Why? Things happen that we can’t explain.”
“Cards are dealt, and you have to play the hand.” Mikey wrote, “Sounds like it’s tough luck but consider the alternative, folding in this game is not a smart move. I don’t like to dwell on the past. It is something I can’t change. But the future is up for grabs. It’s anyone’s game, and a poker face won’t help.”
Coping with Cancer Mikey’s Way
After receiving a cancer diagnosis, children will need to cope with many challenges along their cancer journey. Challenges like being in an unfamiliar place, meeting new healthcare professionals and undergoing procedures that may be scary or painful. Daily routines change, appearances change, and friendships may even change. Time away from friends and school and regular activities can be lonely and isolating. And long hours of treatment and not feeling well can take its toll, making it even more challenging to cope.
Mikey had an innate ability to find approaches that helped him cope as he traveled along his cancer journey. “My approach to the entire situation has been humor.” he wrote, “Believe it or not, I found light in the darkest of circumstances.”
Mikey wrote about his life as he lived it. It gave him strength; it helped him cope. And perhaps his most amazing and significant coping tool, was creating Mikey’s Way Foundation. “Building this Foundation has been the greatest project of my life.” he wrote. Through Mikey’s Way Foundation he was able to help other kids cope along their own cancer journey. The Foundation’s electronics provide connection, and distraction to help kids cope with cancer.
Coping Strategies
Every patient and their families have different ways of coping. Mikey coped by using humor, journaling, and staying connected with his friends, family and classmates. He also occupied his time using electronics, like the ones Mikey’s Way distributes, which provide distraction and help relieve some of the “toxic boredom.”
The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society offers many great suggestions on ways to help children cope with cancer. Here are just a few of the strategies they recommend parents use:
- Provide structure. Children crave structure. It makes their environment feel more predictable and, thus, more secure. It can also increase the sense that their parents and people they trust are in control of the situation.
- Make their daily lives consistent whenever possible. For example, plan a regular routine that you will follow during your time together in the hospital or clinic.
- Allow your child to make choices when possible (for example, let him or her choose which movie to watch, or what snack to eat). This can help your child with his or her feelings of loss of control.
- Use the same consequences for bad or inappropriate behavior as you did before your child was diagnosed with cancer. Consistency will maintain structure and normalcy.
- Show that you respect your child’s feelings of anger, worry, sadness or fear. Give your child appropriate outlets for expressing these feelings, such as drawing or keeping a journal.
- Keep your child busy with activities during treatment to take his or her mind off difficult and unpleasant experiences.
- Help your child to stay connected with friends from home and school with phone calls, video chats, emails, texts or visits, if possible.
The American Society of Clinical Oncology’s Childhood Cancer: Coping with Treatment is also a great resource for suggestions and information.
References
If Your Child Has Cancer American Cancer Society
Cancer in Children and Adolescents – NCI National Cancer Institute
6 Facts About Childhood Cancer – ACCO American Childhood Cancer Organization
What Is Cancer? (for Kids) — Print Version – Nemours KidsHealth Nemours KidsHealth
Coping With Cancer | Leukemia and Lymphoma Society (lls.org)
Childhood Cancer: Coping with Treatment, American Society of Clinical Oncology, 1/2022
Please Note:
This article is for educational purposes only. For specific medical advice, diagnoses, and treatment, consult your doctor.